Memory.

so just back from my TG trainning .... for 3 days.... go around panisular ... tired but then learn alot.....

it is also a birthday for myself.... just alone passed the day in hotel room in the night.... din even manage open the liquor that i brought.... on the day itself i have my event in penang ... i feel regret that i cant attend the event .... feel sad and sorry for my team mate. im sorry guys.....

i brought some gift... but then im not sure shall i present it ot her or what ..... things happened so sudden and turns out to have this kind of ending......

if this is the end ..... if there is no more turnning point.... i will make myself disappear by end of this year ....... im good in playing hide and seek (in terms that you will not able to seek for me).....
but believe that ? i can tell you that im in penang almost two and the half years ... but no one friend knew i was here for study ..... unless there are a few that i inform them...

im not sure i doing this dicision is right or wrong..... going to leave this nice island for a girl again ? where shall i go next ? i have not idea at all..... how stupid im ....... leaving both big city.... im not going to KL for the same reason as well..... so..... i really have no life start end of this year!!!!

today.... when to KLIA.... saw people depart from the airport..... i saw two women wearing boot walking around in the airport.... the first thing that comes into my mind is her.....

i really don't know why..... i really stupid !!! stupid for what i did ...... and i always hurt myself in the same thing......

im not sure.... i think ...... soon.... when you all notice im not blogging for 2 months .... i think im gone...... and hopefully i can rest in peace in the end at some where that i wish for .....

i really wish to cry!!! cry out loud that can make me feel better ... but then ..i have no reason for that..... im suffering ..... serious !!! i cant even talk with my monther bout all this ... because is my own dicision.......

im not sure what i was writing now ....... i wish that i will not see the next sun rise again ... so that i can rest for a long long time......

i will only say that i love my family as well as her..... if some day and some how... im no longer can be found....... i will always take care for the person that i care so much in some method....

i thik she is not even knoe i blogging and she will not reading this as well....... so ... readers out there...... just keep this post and every post in here secret ok ? just let me go in silent.... becuase of this reason why my blog title is mind silent voice.....

readers out there don't ever remember me if i'm not showing up myself of you...... just take my appearance is a dream... ok ? please promise me this .....