after a few week din update this blog..... i'm back now...... for a bad moment for myself....
all about love relationship......
yes.... tonight i will hint out the Her that i will always mention in my post .....
so here i begin.....
i start my day with my event meeting at noon than start my shooting with my junior till night..... i'm back home to online that i saw some thing that hit me much ..... so i will keep this post silent in here and also my voice here too ......
i knew her 1 year plus already.... the first sight i saw her.... i cant forget about her ...... and.... i can tell u the true that she is the first girl that i cry at twice after i be in penang ...... that time is just that i had a very bad moment .. i called her up then have a long talk to her... because her voice can really heal my sadness..... so i'm so silly that cry at her on the phone..... i dont know her noticed that or not.. but i seriously did that......
for all this long while i had treated her very well.... all of my penang buddy nad friend asked me that did i dating with her? my only answer was nop........ and my treat to her was beyond the friedship bar line..... i think all my friend that saw me how i treat her will say that.....
i did many times to tell myself that not to love her... but in the end .... i really fall in love with her.... and i cant tell much bout this feeling... because love is always abstract ....
i say out all this tonight because i will broke my promise to her soon..... few months ago i promised her that i will stay in penang untill she graduated from college... so that everytime when she faced problem in study i will be the first one will be there to help her ......
but tonight i will post it in this post that tell myself that soon ..... i will leave penang ..... because tonight i notice that in her FB she mention that "to love him or not" and i think the him will not be ....
i leave because i really sont know how to faced her after she realyl in date with other guys..... i dont even know how to start my talk with her...... i always scare to faced all this ....
so i think i will leave penang soon... i will give up to continue my degree studies in KDU....
sorry mum because i go against your word this time...
the second hot was sl post. i saw sum thg that really dont wish to see..... even though that i knew she already have a happy life... but then .......... ........
before december 2009 reached settle up a; the thg i wanna do... all the promise and all the wish that i make to myself ... so that when i leave penang... i will have no regret ...
all of my friend, buddy or brothers that reading this post.. i hope that you al will respect my decision and wish my good luck in finishing my promise.... i knew most of you cares about me.... and you all will surely say i'm so fucked up and stupid to do such thing..... because of love... i'm willing to give up on my degree and also my chance of working here.... i just wish to live in my happy world with the person i really care and love... if i cant get to do so.. i consider myself as a loser...... because for me.... love in all kind is the most important motivation that i have for myself.....
i just dont wish i leave here ... but... i cant fuck my brain this time to say i must stay in penang already......
the reason i dun go KL for all kind of network because i dont wish to meet sl in market one day.... and once i leave here... i wont come back anymore..... i swear .... please give me the best memory that i can remember in my life... so that i can always remember all the crazy, fun, and happy thg that i did with you all.......
i really sad now !!! i just finished up 660ml tiger in 10 min.... 2 more to go ..... and i will finish up my jim beam and my mile seven as well... after tonight .... i will not touch al this thg... i promise.... if i smoke and drink again.... i'm willing shorten my life to the person that i love and care to live in this lovely world .......
after this post... i will not so often blog anymore... because i wil try my best to find all my happy memory in panang ..... so that i can leave here in peace and silently......
al the best luck for you all as my redears ... i love you all .....
i love you yf... i really do....
and all the best wish for SL with JL.....
good day to all of you...
Friday, September 25, 2009
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
09-09-09
today is 9th of september 2009..... transalate in chinese.... it wll brings the meaning of long last eternity.... " jiu jiu jiu" is a good number combination and also very meanful day..... i'm lucky to passed this day in my life...
here is some thing that i will keep it in my memory... till the eternity with the SEAL.... two song below will always company along the SEAL till the end of my breath....
a song that will make me cry .... for some reason..
another song that will always be her song....
here is some thing that i will keep it in my memory... till the eternity with the SEAL.... two song below will always company along the SEAL till the end of my breath....
a song that will make me cry .... for some reason..
another song that will always be her song....
wish SL happy always....
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Brother Accident
so.... few days din updated blog... now i'm back again.....
sunday i went to ipoh to visit my taiping brother..... he really got bang by car and seriously hurt.... when i saw him.... my heart damm pain.... he really hurt in the way that he can't work for the next six months....
in the hospital...... what i can do is just cheer him up even though he only can lay on bed to talk with us.... he really hurt badly.....
when i saw his leg... i kinda like have the feeling of vomit when i eat bread that day during hi-tea with him in the hospital......
four brothers that in penang include me went to visit him.... i can feel that during the sixteen days in hospital..... that day when we visited him.... ia the happiest day during the days in hospital....
after tthe visit.... we head back tp penang.. on the way back ... we stop by ipoh and nibong tebal for food..... we hunt for the nice food like dinosour..... hahah .....
during the walk in nibong tabal night market.... i brought her a nice cute pink colour minie pillow blanket..... i hope she like that....
today is a short post... don't know what to write...
still her alot......
and i can feel that time passed very fast.....
and i raelise i almost reached to the end .... 3 more months.....
i hope... i really can be with her .....
i love you...
i'm off to sleep now... good night..
sunday i went to ipoh to visit my taiping brother..... he really got bang by car and seriously hurt.... when i saw him.... my heart damm pain.... he really hurt in the way that he can't work for the next six months....
in the hospital...... what i can do is just cheer him up even though he only can lay on bed to talk with us.... he really hurt badly.....
when i saw his leg... i kinda like have the feeling of vomit when i eat bread that day during hi-tea with him in the hospital......
four brothers that in penang include me went to visit him.... i can feel that during the sixteen days in hospital..... that day when we visited him.... ia the happiest day during the days in hospital....
after tthe visit.... we head back tp penang.. on the way back ... we stop by ipoh and nibong tebal for food..... we hunt for the nice food like dinosour..... hahah .....
during the walk in nibong tabal night market.... i brought her a nice cute pink colour minie pillow blanket..... i hope she like that....
today is a short post... don't know what to write...
still her alot......
and i can feel that time passed very fast.....
and i raelise i almost reached to the end .... 3 more months.....
i hope... i really can be with her .....
i love you...
i'm off to sleep now... good night..
Friday, September 4, 2009
Things That Happen To Me This Two Night
after my last post.... things happening around me ..... alot ..... there are things that cheer me up and there is bad bad thing that happen too..... let me list out one by one here ....
03/09/09
6.00pm:
post on my FB wall to invite people join me for dinner......
7.00pm:
when out to eat dinner with my formal hometown classmate near sungai nibong.
9.00pm:
when out with Gan.siang for second round dinner..... steamboat.... i'm really full in that night.
before the steamboat, we brought 2 birthday cake for yee zai's girlfriend.
12.00am:
went out to buy beer again...... drink at 5th floor.... untill 5am.
5.01am:
reach home, then bath and sleep.
04/09/09
12.00pm:
just wake up, then ready to class at 3pm
1.00pm:
decided to skip class,go prangin for shopping, planned to buy some stuff as persent to put in her new car.
3.00pm:
end up buying my brother's graduation present, and coming tuesday will bring her to choose the present for her car.
4.00pm:
called my bro in taiping to ask him come back celebrate brothers graduation ceremony... who know...... he met up in a serious accident in ipoh after his work...... broken leg , ribs and pelvic bone...... he no not dare to tell me, because he said this news will effect me in my studies for my final semester..... i fuck him up in the phone...... because didn't tell me earlier...... so i'm goin to ipoh on sunday to visit him...... hopefully he is ok .....
7.00pm:
reached home..... i ask my housemate to go dinner together.... so... we end up steamboat again..... untill 11.00pm.....
12.00am:
i'm home now.... feeling full and really worry for my brother in ipoh now.... tired..... hoping sunday come fast.. so i can go ipoh !!!
03/09/09
6.00pm:
post on my FB wall to invite people join me for dinner......
7.00pm:
when out to eat dinner with my formal hometown classmate near sungai nibong.
9.00pm:
when out with Gan.siang for second round dinner..... steamboat.... i'm really full in that night.
before the steamboat, we brought 2 birthday cake for yee zai's girlfriend.
12.00am:
went out to buy beer again...... drink at 5th floor.... untill 5am.
5.01am:
reach home, then bath and sleep.
04/09/09
12.00pm:
just wake up, then ready to class at 3pm
1.00pm:
decided to skip class,go prangin for shopping, planned to buy some stuff as persent to put in her new car.
3.00pm:
end up buying my brother's graduation present, and coming tuesday will bring her to choose the present for her car.
4.00pm:
called my bro in taiping to ask him come back celebrate brothers graduation ceremony... who know...... he met up in a serious accident in ipoh after his work...... broken leg , ribs and pelvic bone...... he no not dare to tell me, because he said this news will effect me in my studies for my final semester..... i fuck him up in the phone...... because didn't tell me earlier...... so i'm goin to ipoh on sunday to visit him...... hopefully he is ok .....
7.00pm:
reached home..... i ask my housemate to go dinner together.... so... we end up steamboat again..... untill 11.00pm.....
12.00am:
i'm home now.... feeling full and really worry for my brother in ipoh now.... tired..... hoping sunday come fast.. so i can go ipoh !!!
Thursday, September 3, 2009
What a Night.....
i really enjoy my time in penang last night with nick(the hot stuff), kok yang (the young cock), vick(the dick+drunker last night), jeremy (the germz),siew ee(the newbies),(the royal)Prince and raja.
they gave me a wonderful night at Mr Pot last night...... even though i didn't get myself drunk last night but i really enjoying see my buddy drunk and they sing like crazy in Mr Pot ... hahah .... fun the see them drunk ...... i really enjoy it...... we enjoy the time we spend together... and the topic we talk ... make us laugh like crazy....... spend quiet alot.. but is worth for the moment..... that why i always said " beer will bring cheering moment for you some times...."
after the chill we go eat mamak ... then we go for another round in Mr Pot again ..... just to get enough beer for the night.... hahaha .... after the drinking session ... we went to penang airport to send our senior to taiwan for their degree studies.....
actually in the airport.... my mind have alot of question that appear ...... " will i have this chance to fly out " " will i have so many buddy sending me off at the airport " " will i tell all my friend that i'm leaving " " will i....... " alot alot of thing that comes into my mind ..... i just don't know how to say it .... kinda moody for awhile in there ..... but then .... seniors......... i don't really close to them also ... just go there for fun only......
after sending them into the departure gate..... time already around 6.30am.... i'm still not home yet .... this hour .... we drive off from the airport.... heading to the dim sum place and get ourself a very nice breakfast....... hahaha ... so ...... after beer and chill we go airport, after awhile of sadness in airport, we go dim sum to heal everything up with nice breakfast ....
after the breakfast... time already showed 8.30am...... is time for me to go home .... take a bath and rest .. haha ..... then now 5.30pm... i woke up ... to share my last night moment with you all.......
soon or later i think sum where around oct or nov.... i gonna make a party to farwell myself .. and i just hoping all my buddy will come over ..... get yourself drunk and let me laugh at you ok !!!! just let me have some silly moment in penang for the last 3 months before i really leave here..... i knew i gonna miss everything here .... esspecially her ... but i just don't know how to tell her .... ... i think i just need to silent myself off very soon ...
so .... dun care everything first ..... just gila gila pass my day in happy mood .... then .. make myself happy in this 3 months ...... remember everyone, everything here..... i can promise i will leave my mark here for the last time ..
they gave me a wonderful night at Mr Pot last night...... even though i didn't get myself drunk last night but i really enjoying see my buddy drunk and they sing like crazy in Mr Pot ... hahah .... fun the see them drunk ...... i really enjoy it...... we enjoy the time we spend together... and the topic we talk ... make us laugh like crazy....... spend quiet alot.. but is worth for the moment..... that why i always said " beer will bring cheering moment for you some times...."
after the chill we go eat mamak ... then we go for another round in Mr Pot again ..... just to get enough beer for the night.... hahaha .... after the drinking session ... we went to penang airport to send our senior to taiwan for their degree studies.....
actually in the airport.... my mind have alot of question that appear ...... " will i have this chance to fly out " " will i have so many buddy sending me off at the airport " " will i tell all my friend that i'm leaving " " will i....... " alot alot of thing that comes into my mind ..... i just don't know how to say it .... kinda moody for awhile in there ..... but then .... seniors......... i don't really close to them also ... just go there for fun only......
after sending them into the departure gate..... time already around 6.30am.... i'm still not home yet .... this hour .... we drive off from the airport.... heading to the dim sum place and get ourself a very nice breakfast....... hahaha ... so ...... after beer and chill we go airport, after awhile of sadness in airport, we go dim sum to heal everything up with nice breakfast ....
after the breakfast... time already showed 8.30am...... is time for me to go home .... take a bath and rest .. haha ..... then now 5.30pm... i woke up ... to share my last night moment with you all.......
soon or later i think sum where around oct or nov.... i gonna make a party to farwell myself .. and i just hoping all my buddy will come over ..... get yourself drunk and let me laugh at you ok !!!! just let me have some silly moment in penang for the last 3 months before i really leave here..... i knew i gonna miss everything here .... esspecially her ... but i just don't know how to tell her .... ... i think i just need to silent myself off very soon ...
so .... dun care everything first ..... just gila gila pass my day in happy mood .... then .. make myself happy in this 3 months ...... remember everyone, everything here..... i can promise i will leave my mark here for the last time ..
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Hungry Ghost Festival
yupp..... today is the hungry ghost festival.. so i going to skip another day of night class .. i scare ghost disturb me when i on my way back(konon sendiri takut :P )..... and tonight also .... i promise to make myself drunk again at sunset bar....... as you know ... last post i told you all i had been title as a lier ... im damm feel not nice about it ... so tonight ... ithink i'm going to make myself drunk so that i can forget things that i'm dun like when i wake up ...... dun worry ... tml morning i don't have morning class.... because of GAA ... so ... i can enjoy my night ....
still in moody actuallly .... i cant tell you all how much i miss her in word .... i really wish to be with her.... last night before i slee i send her a sms .... about some thing .. i feel that lately . she just don't so often reply me anymore.. is it some thing goes wrong d ? i don't know . i just didn't ask her much .... let it be .... just let me happilly fuck myself to be happy ... then this will be my last 3 months here i think ...... so .... everything will gone soon i think .....
i feel that quiet people read my post ..... but i'm not sure is her reading this .. i just .....
..... ..... ... ...
love you and miss you will only i would like to say it to you ......
but soon i knew some thing will reach to end ..... when i make myself gone silently...
so ..... waiting for the moon ... and beeer / liquor again to make myself drunk ...
still in moody actuallly .... i cant tell you all how much i miss her in word .... i really wish to be with her.... last night before i slee i send her a sms .... about some thing .. i feel that lately . she just don't so often reply me anymore.. is it some thing goes wrong d ? i don't know . i just didn't ask her much .... let it be .... just let me happilly fuck myself to be happy ... then this will be my last 3 months here i think ...... so .... everything will gone soon i think .....
i feel that quiet people read my post ..... but i'm not sure is her reading this .. i just .....
..... ..... ... ...
love you and miss you will only i would like to say it to you ......
but soon i knew some thing will reach to end ..... when i make myself gone silently...
so ..... waiting for the moon ... and beeer / liquor again to make myself drunk ...
Lier
yupp...... lier... "penipu"......... "da pian zhi"......
penang people..... do i really look like a lier to you all ? i can tell you.... at this moment ..... i kinda upset... because i found out that ..... people in this state choose not to believe me anymore....... actually.....what really happened ? can you all tell me ?
i can admit that ... 4 years ago...... i'm lie-ing in a love relationship...... i though that ny making beautiful lies will create alot sweet moment.... but ...... 1 year ago.... i realise i made a fucking big mistake by doing all this " beautiful lies" that cause me lost alot in term of everything in relationship..... and i knew i will receive karma from what silly mistake a i did for the passed 3 years.... i'm seriouly regret about that.... i really do...... as a result .... i promise i will never make and lies ..... and as a sign for me to always remember this promise... i did a S.E.A.L on myself ..... so that everything morning when i wake up.... brushing my teeth .. i will always remember how silly i hurt her for 3 years .... and how bad was i'm at that time .....
as a result..... i can truely sad that i never lie a penangiest ..... but untill today... after 2 years i'm here..... i realise that poeple around me never believe me anymore.... i can tell you that i'm fucking sad now ... i really do .....
things keep bodering me in my mind ....... i know my days is nearly here for me to say good bye...... thing keeps fuck me off....
i knew i'm fucking mistery in everything i did.... this is me .... i never want to promote myself ... and willing to give away credit if you all want... i just want to make her happy but seems like she really think that i'm a mother fucking lie-ing around her.......
i know i'm poor in everything .... no car , no cash , no house, not good looking ... but what i did just to make you happier.......
i dont mind anymore..... if .... you people in penang or else where that i'm so like to lie you all ... please put a BIG BIG sign in my chat box and tell me how i lied you ok !!!!!!
i really dont want to leave penang because i wishing something to happen end of this year ... but....... if the people of the state donr allowed me to stay here anymore.. i can make sure that ..... i will be gone in penang straight after my exam is over..... and i promise..... i will leave in silent ... i reather leaving alone in sadness..... and i will not explain further for all fake news that you all heard .... just take me as a mother fucker lier ok !!!!
in making you all happy in the next four month ..... i will silent off..... i promise i wil do that ...... you all wil not see me if the time not needed me to be there......
sorry to al my readers ...... this posr contain alot of rude word ... forgive me for saying all the F word .... sorry .... i just too sad and too angry about this ....
penang people..... do i really look like a lier to you all ? i can tell you.... at this moment ..... i kinda upset... because i found out that ..... people in this state choose not to believe me anymore....... actually.....what really happened ? can you all tell me ?
i can admit that ... 4 years ago...... i'm lie-ing in a love relationship...... i though that ny making beautiful lies will create alot sweet moment.... but ...... 1 year ago.... i realise i made a fucking big mistake by doing all this " beautiful lies" that cause me lost alot in term of everything in relationship..... and i knew i will receive karma from what silly mistake a i did for the passed 3 years.... i'm seriouly regret about that.... i really do...... as a result .... i promise i will never make and lies ..... and as a sign for me to always remember this promise... i did a S.E.A.L on myself ..... so that everything morning when i wake up.... brushing my teeth .. i will always remember how silly i hurt her for 3 years .... and how bad was i'm at that time .....
as a result..... i can truely sad that i never lie a penangiest ..... but untill today... after 2 years i'm here..... i realise that poeple around me never believe me anymore.... i can tell you that i'm fucking sad now ... i really do .....
things keep bodering me in my mind ....... i know my days is nearly here for me to say good bye...... thing keeps fuck me off....
i knew i'm fucking mistery in everything i did.... this is me .... i never want to promote myself ... and willing to give away credit if you all want... i just want to make her happy but seems like she really think that i'm a mother fucking lie-ing around her.......
i know i'm poor in everything .... no car , no cash , no house, not good looking ... but what i did just to make you happier.......
i dont mind anymore..... if .... you people in penang or else where that i'm so like to lie you all ... please put a BIG BIG sign in my chat box and tell me how i lied you ok !!!!!!
i really dont want to leave penang because i wishing something to happen end of this year ... but....... if the people of the state donr allowed me to stay here anymore.. i can make sure that ..... i will be gone in penang straight after my exam is over..... and i promise..... i will leave in silent ... i reather leaving alone in sadness..... and i will not explain further for all fake news that you all heard .... just take me as a mother fucker lier ok !!!!
in making you all happy in the next four month ..... i will silent off..... i promise i wil do that ...... you all wil not see me if the time not needed me to be there......
sorry to al my readers ...... this posr contain alot of rude word ... forgive me for saying all the F word .... sorry .... i just too sad and too angry about this ....
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Curious Day
Good afternoon to all my readers out there.... i'm happy to have you all reading my crap here.... hahah ....... sharing the word here..... some times i wonders..... who will be my readers ? i really wanted to know .... mind to drop some word in the chat box when you all read my blog... can ?
hahahaha ^^
so back to my writing ...... today was the first day of my second week studies in college..... today i got alot of question from my coursemate and junior..... their question are alomst the same in point ... but asked me in the different way..... they asked me .... " are you chasing/tackling her ?" " do you still love with the same girl ? " " do you having two love relationship at once ? " " are you still single ? " all kind of this question was asked toward me during my 3 hours in college..... then my answer will be " ya , i'm still looking foward to have love relationship with her " " i'm single now " " yupp i'm still in love with the same girl " ..... then they reply me with " ohh... " " what the fuck !!! u still in love with her ? almost a year story..... but you both still not together... what for ? " " ohh.. i though you already have a girlfriend at some where then still looking forward to be with her... " all this negative reply i have .
hahahaha....... i just wondering .... actually what is happening .... why at the same day and quiet at the same time ..... everyone is concern about my love life? is it you all my blog readers ?
first of all.... i would like to say thanks if you all are my blog readers... because you all help me to earn RM0.25 last month ... hahahaha ....... second ...... i wish you all are really clear that who the girl that i always mention in my blog and i title her as " her " in most of my post...... thirdly.... even is already a years story that between me and her... i might knew the outcome that you all might not really understand ..... and i not really wanted to talk about in this post .....
hmm..... today... missed my first class in college... over slept.. hahah ....... then the noon class.... i realise that the final project was so so hard .... i going to die ...... it will make me suffer soon ..... haiz ....
final sem ... everthing is goin to change soon ....... sad ......
i just wondering .... why her PM in msn state " left 122 days " she is counting for wat date ? i really wanted to know ..... if you all out there that know what is going to happen ... mind to tell me ?
so ... here i will stop for today..... see you all tomorrow again ....
hahahaha ^^
so back to my writing ...... today was the first day of my second week studies in college..... today i got alot of question from my coursemate and junior..... their question are alomst the same in point ... but asked me in the different way..... they asked me .... " are you chasing/tackling her ?" " do you still love with the same girl ? " " do you having two love relationship at once ? " " are you still single ? " all kind of this question was asked toward me during my 3 hours in college..... then my answer will be " ya , i'm still looking foward to have love relationship with her " " i'm single now " " yupp i'm still in love with the same girl " ..... then they reply me with " ohh... " " what the fuck !!! u still in love with her ? almost a year story..... but you both still not together... what for ? " " ohh.. i though you already have a girlfriend at some where then still looking forward to be with her... " all this negative reply i have .
hahahaha....... i just wondering .... actually what is happening .... why at the same day and quiet at the same time ..... everyone is concern about my love life? is it you all my blog readers ?
first of all.... i would like to say thanks if you all are my blog readers... because you all help me to earn RM0.25 last month ... hahahaha ....... second ...... i wish you all are really clear that who the girl that i always mention in my blog and i title her as " her " in most of my post...... thirdly.... even is already a years story that between me and her... i might knew the outcome that you all might not really understand ..... and i not really wanted to talk about in this post .....
hmm..... today... missed my first class in college... over slept.. hahah ....... then the noon class.... i realise that the final project was so so hard .... i going to die ...... it will make me suffer soon ..... haiz ....
final sem ... everthing is goin to change soon ....... sad ......
i just wondering .... why her PM in msn state " left 122 days " she is counting for wat date ? i really wanted to know ..... if you all out there that know what is going to happen ... mind to tell me ?
so ... here i will stop for today..... see you all tomorrow again ....
I'm Back......
Yupp... after a 12 hour travel.... finally i'm safely reach penang..... waitng morning to come..... waiting the sun to rise..... you know why ? because when the morning come.... i can send my hand made lovely moon cake to her..... hope she like to have it.......
this hour i just done with my dinner and bath... i'm clean and tired now... later 8am still have to go to class..... is mass media & malaysian society lecture.... haiz ... goin to be a boring class..... cant late to the class also ... because the lecturer ( is a long story..... cant finish to talk here.....)
so........ i think i'm goin to sleep now .... wanted to writre more..... but lazy already(because of tired).....
good night to all my lovely readers......
this hour i just done with my dinner and bath... i'm clean and tired now... later 8am still have to go to class..... is mass media & malaysian society lecture.... haiz ... goin to be a boring class..... cant late to the class also ... because the lecturer ( is a long story..... cant finish to talk here.....)
so........ i think i'm goin to sleep now .... wanted to writre more..... but lazy already(because of tired).....
good night to all my lovely readers......
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)