Life

have been a long while i didn't post any new stuff ....... now sitting in the office alone during sunday really make me feel bored ... so dicided to post sum thing new.

last week just moved house ... from a apartment which has swimming pool and gym moved to a low cost flat.... but i'm kinda like it because my new house just near by the sea... so i every morning i can go jogging there.

my bro which met up accident last year still having his rest at home, he go for second surgery becuase the bone do not connect well.

uncle mahmud pass away last month ..... regret didn't attend his funeral . boss james went to china for four months go through a kidney transplant, this transplant he only gt 50% chances to get well.... i didn't went to airport to send him off.... so i diceded to wait him in penang hopefully he can come back safely.

my digi number had been burn few days back ... now im still looking ways with the digi center to get back my number... becuase the number really meaning to me.

june im going singapore working for sound exhibition and melaka for tour guide job. july gonna fly over singapore again for more then 10 days for the youth olympic game for the sound man job, after that will be in vietnam for around 10days for a concert as sound man. after coming back from the 2 heavy job, will go for jay show concert job as sound man..... kinda looking forward to it.....

in my relationship life..... still stuck . is thinking a good way to let myself forget bout SL becuase i know that JL will treat her very well...... yet here in PG, im still stuck v YF ..... still doing my secision ... once i give up everything ... i know im gonna fly again ..... wanted to make myself clear. is planning the best give for SL's graduation present next year, and my present for this coming sept graduation ceremony.

had been months didn't go back kuantan to visit my mum, after a day cny celebration with her... that cny 2nd day have to go back to work d .....

life ..... getting harder... and lonely ...... what shall i do to improve myself ..... haiz .......
is hardworking to find out myself .....

Never Notice

yupp... never notice that .... for another week of exam ..... im going to grad ...... times passed so fast..... i never realise that .....

in this unknown city.... i have my happy, sad, cheers,emo,wild,crazy,sweet time ..... is time .... i think is time ..... for me to gog on with my journey ..... move to another unknown town again .......

where shall it be ? i still havent make up my mind .... maybe ..... just pack up my bag ..... go to the bus station .... buy a ticket ... just travel any where that thy offer .......

sure i will feel sad to leave this city... because this is a place that i have my hard time passed through.... i may not coming back here once i leave ..... but then i know i will miss alot of thing here..... specially her..... alot of friend tell me that please dun crazy for her anymore becuase you will never be with her.... yet ...... i know i will it may b a true fact .. but it is just some thing mistery that i will always heading toward it....... just let me stupid for another week ...

once exam over....... im grad ..... then ... thing will forever change .......

plan is there for next year ...... boss agreed to pay up..... friend agreed too ..... is time to build my own company .... in two of the major field in the market .......

next year i wanna gt my money .. to get my own best birthday present ever....... 1 year time.... just give me another year of time ....

心疼

这篇文章我只是写出我的心声。。。。没有想过埋怨任何人，请别介意。

自从帮不到她买机票那天开始，我两的感情越来越糟。。。。。她开始没有信任没有信任我的价值。我真的好难受！！！！能做的我都办了。我还能做什么？？

她能与别人说笑，不过面对我就是笑不出的。。。。我真的好压力！！！我做了那么多的事情难道你一点也不感受到？？我为你做的，兄弟听了也说我白痴～～～ 我知道自己所做的事，连自己也觉得白痴，不过明白是为你而做我都不介意。。。。我知道我时间不多，如果有一天我真的离开了，我最想的人一定会是你！！！

我明白自己条件不是好过别人。。。。你有你的权利。。。。我回尊重你。
接下来的。。。。。我还是会一一办陀你交代的事，不问一二。在我离开的那一天。。。。。。我会向你交代一切。。。。

One Years Old

Here comes the S.E.A.L..... it is one years old already...... time passed so fast ... one years passed so fast ... just a snap of of a finger time......

in this one years .... alot of things happened .... sad, emo, angry, happy.. all kind of felling also have.... even though S.E.A.L stay empty and still alone on the sholder..... i knew that it will understand the feeling og my heart.... and deep down my heart there is some one that i care so much....

soon.... S.E.A.L going off from this town .... hopefully ..... S.E.A.L will be label with someone name.....

happy birthday S.E.A.L

Memory.

so just back from my TG trainning .... for 3 days.... go around panisular ... tired but then learn alot.....

it is also a birthday for myself.... just alone passed the day in hotel room in the night.... din even manage open the liquor that i brought.... on the day itself i have my event in penang ... i feel regret that i cant attend the event .... feel sad and sorry for my team mate. im sorry guys.....

i brought some gift... but then im not sure shall i present it ot her or what ..... things happened so sudden and turns out to have this kind of ending......

if this is the end ..... if there is no more turnning point.... i will make myself disappear by end of this year ....... im good in playing hide and seek (in terms that you will not able to seek for me).....
but believe that ? i can tell you that im in penang almost two and the half years ... but no one friend knew i was here for study ..... unless there are a few that i inform them...

im not sure i doing this dicision is right or wrong..... going to leave this nice island for a girl again ? where shall i go next ? i have not idea at all..... how stupid im ....... leaving both big city.... im not going to KL for the same reason as well..... so..... i really have no life start end of this year!!!!

today.... when to KLIA.... saw people depart from the airport..... i saw two women wearing boot walking around in the airport.... the first thing that comes into my mind is her.....

i really don't know why..... i really stupid !!! stupid for what i did ...... and i always hurt myself in the same thing......

im not sure.... i think ...... soon.... when you all notice im not blogging for 2 months .... i think im gone...... and hopefully i can rest in peace in the end at some where that i wish for .....

i really wish to cry!!! cry out loud that can make me feel better ... but then ..i have no reason for that..... im suffering ..... serious !!! i cant even talk with my monther bout all this ... because is my own dicision.......

im not sure what i was writing now ....... i wish that i will not see the next sun rise again ... so that i can rest for a long long time......

i will only say that i love my family as well as her..... if some day and some how... im no longer can be found....... i will always take care for the person that i care so much in some method....

i thik she is not even knoe i blogging and she will not reading this as well....... so ... readers out there...... just keep this post and every post in here secret ok ? just let me go in silent.... becuase of this reason why my blog title is mind silent voice.....

readers out there don't ever remember me if i'm not showing up myself of you...... just take my appearance is a dream... ok ? please promise me this .....

一百天的承诺...

第一次用华语写部落格。。。感觉怪怪的。。。今天的标题有些的特别吗？“一百天的承诺”

在未来的一百天内将会有不同的我出现，因为我剩下的天数不多，就只有那一百天。我会好好的利用。

好想舆她在一起，但是应该是幻想的事了。。。。。。。 愿她幸福吧 ！！！

从今以后，没我的事，我一概不理。。。静下来。。。体会这世界。。。好让我不会留下遗憾。。。

不会在有再见这回事了。。。

“悄悄的我走了，正如我悄悄的来。。。
我挥一挥衣袖，不带走一片云彩。。。”

Change

long time havent post any thing here. today im not here to talk how and what happen for this few days . i just wanted to say to all of you ....

start from today and now onward i will not talk and speaking anything that not related to me , i will not do and help on any matter that not related to me ......

i don't understand that wh7y people keep using my name to over come some mater ... and i cna tell you that i really hate this happen . becuase you use my name to pass or over come some problem and do you ever realise that you will bring trouble to me ?

i dont know that why peple can be so selfish ? or im too easy to get bully from you all ? do you think all this is not a matter at all ?

i really dont know ... im help less , i cant do any thing. for the pass 1 year i had been to be a very very so hai person , i know it from the beginnning and i dont know why and this can happen ... if you wana talk what shit bad about me ... i will just let it be .... soon or later .... i will make up my mind .... and that time i can promise all of you i will leave in silnet without tell no one of you ..... the good me will leave this place in silent....

some how i feel not to do so and not to leave this place ... but there is no more reason i stay back .... people using me , people looking down on me. what so ever ....... i already get sick of all this .... i'm sick of all the bullshit ...... im done with it ... im leaving .... soon..... very soon ..

10 K

before going in to 10 topic today .... i'm going to talk bout her first.....

just now .... i saw few comment in her fb ... now only i realise why she so emo and sad this few days ....... because if the him i think.... i knew i cant say much about this topic ... because i'm guessing all the thing that i know .... i can only tell her that , i love you..... i raelly do ... and i dont know how long i will wait for you ... maybe i will wait till the last i'm here before i fly out ...... i can tell you that i'm wiling to do what ever that you tell me to...... (i knew you readers out there will say i damm stupid or i'm a dumm fuck..... but this is how am i in talking about love ... of not ... i wont have a S.E.A.L on me .... )

-ends-

back to the 10k .... yupp...... this is what i'm going to earn per month soon ..... this is my target .... i will do all kind of business and work as hard and as smart as i can ..... i will make myself involve in al kind of busienss soon........ the reason i have this target because i wanted to earn back all the things that i lost in my past........

soon ... if u all want to have any thing just contact me first ok !!! i will give you the best ever price you will never have ... i can also provide you a 24/7 service that i will follow up your deal.....

10 Roses

yesterday i just back from a 4 days work at outstation...... when i drop by KL i manage to get her 10 roses.....
so yesterday i presented to her.......
wish her really like the roses .....

can any 1 tell me wat is the meaning of 10 roses ? i knew it bring meaning.... but i'm not sure what thats means ..... can some 1 tell me ?