Double attack in 15 min

after a few week din update this blog..... i'm back now...... for a bad moment for myself....
all about love relationship......

yes.... tonight i will hint out the Her that i will always mention in my post .....

so here i begin.....

i start my day with my event meeting at noon than start my shooting with my junior till night..... i'm back home to online that i saw some thing that hit me much ..... so i will keep this post silent in here and also my voice here too ......

i knew her 1 year plus already.... the first sight i saw her.... i cant forget about her ...... and.... i can tell u the true that she is the first girl that i cry at twice after i be in penang ...... that time is just that i had a very bad moment .. i called her up then have a long talk to her... because her voice can really heal my sadness..... so i'm so silly that cry at her on the phone..... i dont know her noticed that or not.. but i seriously did that......
for all this long while i had treated her very well.... all of my penang buddy nad friend asked me that did i dating with her? my only answer was nop........ and my treat to her was beyond the friedship bar line..... i think all my friend that saw me how i treat her will say that.....
i did many times to tell myself that not to love her... but in the end .... i really fall in love with her.... and i cant tell much bout this feeling... because love is always abstract ....
i say out all this tonight because i will broke my promise to her soon..... few months ago i promised her that i will stay in penang untill she graduated from college... so that everytime when she faced problem in study i will be the first one will be there to help her ......
but tonight i will post it in this post that tell myself that soon ..... i will leave penang ..... because tonight i notice that in her FB she mention that "to love him or not" and i think the him will not be ....
i leave because i really sont know how to faced her after she realyl in date with other guys..... i dont even know how to start my talk with her...... i always scare to faced all this ....
so i think i will leave penang soon... i will give up to continue my degree studies in KDU....
sorry mum because i go against your word this time...

the second hot was sl post. i saw sum thg that really dont wish to see..... even though that i knew she already have a happy life... but then .......... ........

before december 2009 reached settle up a; the thg i wanna do... all the promise and all the wish that i make to myself ... so that when i leave penang... i will have no regret ...

all of my friend, buddy or brothers that reading this post.. i hope that you al will respect my decision and wish my good luck in finishing my promise.... i knew most of you cares about me.... and you all will surely say i'm so fucked up and stupid to do such thing..... because of love... i'm willing to give up on my degree and also my chance of working here.... i just wish to live in my happy world with the person i really care and love... if i cant get to do so.. i consider myself as a loser...... because for me.... love in all kind is the most important motivation that i have for myself.....

i just dont wish i leave here ... but... i cant fuck my brain this time to say i must stay in penang already......

the reason i dun go KL for all kind of network because i dont wish to meet sl in market one day.... and once i leave here... i wont come back anymore..... i swear .... please give me the best memory that i can remember in my life... so that i can always remember all the crazy, fun, and happy thg that i did with you all.......

i really sad now !!! i just finished up 660ml tiger in 10 min.... 2 more to go ..... and i will finish up my jim beam and my mile seven as well... after tonight .... i will not touch al this thg... i promise.... if i smoke and drink again.... i'm willing shorten my life to the person that i love and care to live in this lovely world .......

after this post... i will not so often blog anymore... because i wil try my best to find all my happy memory in panang ..... so that i can leave here in peace and silently......

al the best luck for you all as my redears ... i love you all .....
i love you yf... i really do....
and all the best wish for SL with JL.....

good day to all of you...